


Friendship Forged in Hellfire

by tomfoolery14



Series: SH Tarot Fic [2]
Category: Shadowhunters (TV)
Genre: Angst, Developing Friendships, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Episode: s03e21 Alliance, Fix-It of Sorts, Gen, essentially the friendship we deserved, more like half-coda and half-fix it, technically it's not toooooo angsty because we know the resolutions happen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-18
Updated: 2020-03-18
Packaged: 2021-02-23 01:33:30
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,629
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23203588
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/tomfoolery14/pseuds/tomfoolery14
Summary: Half-coda + half-fix it for s3ep21After Alec announces his intention to turn into a vampire in order to go to Edom for Magnus, everyone is a little concerned. Simon in particular is shaken, not only by the request but by the obvious pain Alec is clearly in. Obviously he's in desperate need of a friend right now.SH Tarot - week 3: The High Priestess
Relationships: Magnus Bane/Alec Lightwood, Simon Lewis & Alec Lightwood
Series: SH Tarot Fic [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1664068
Comments: 18
Kudos: 111
Collections: Favorite Malec Stories, Shadowhunters Tarot Challenge





	Friendship Forged in Hellfire

**Author's Note:**

> The high priestess brings balance to the magician. sometimes action is not always the best course, and it takes wisdom to know when to hold back, weigh your options, and gather your strength. the high priestess is that wisdom, looking within yourself to find the answers, to trust in your own intuition. you don’t need the advice of those around you. you already know the truth. that certainty is power, and when we doubt ourselves or dismiss those gut instincts, we reject the power the high priestess offers us. she heightens our awareness of hidden information, and we would be fools to turn away from that. trust your gut.

Alec leaned his forehead against the cold porcelain of the sink basin for a moment before turning on the tap for cold water. Three cups of coffee had done hardly anything to energize him, so he was resorting to home remedies out of desperation. The stress he was under was taking a toll on him that was working its way from the inside out—his eyelids and the delicate skin below his lower lash line were tinged dark like a day old bruise, the skin around his fingers was increasingly picked raw and bloody, and his jaw was overgrown with three-day-old stubble.

Wetting his fingers, he raked them through his hair as well and shivered at the cold metal of his engagement ring brushing against his temple. Something horrible rose in his throat that felt a lot like dread, making it hard to swallow. Every day that passed felt like another million miles added to the distance that kept the two of them apart. Sometimes when Alec flexed his fingers a certain way, the still foreign weight on the third finger of his left hand felt like the last tangible tie to Magnus he had. Each day it became more and more frayed, and he couldn’t help but wonder how much longer before it was completely unraveled.

The loft was dull and lifeless, like a living thing that was decaying in slow motion. Even the plants that depended on very little to thrive were all starting to wither and gray, as if their life force was being slowly drained away. Sometimes, Alec just couldn’t bear to sit in the heavy silence and went to the Institute to escape the aching void in his chest. Usually though he spent around twenty hours a day cloistered away in the apothecary, reading every scrap of information he could get his hands on that bore any relevance to his dilemma. Unfortunately few people had ever felt the need to see the barren lands of Edom with their own eyes, let alone lived to tell the tale.

As Alec poured his fourth cup of black coffee, a quick and somewhat timid knock on the front door made him look up. His left hand instinctively touched the handle of the adamas blade strapped to his leg as he moved towards it. He didn’t quite know who he was expecting to see, but it was definitely not Simon Lewis cradling a covered plate against his chest. “Hey, Alec.”

“Hi?” It hadn’t necessarily been intended as a question but he was at such a loss that it wasn’t disingenuous. “What’s wrong?”

“Oh, nothing. I mean—I made you _knish_. Izzy said you haven’t been eating well, and this has always been one of my favorite comfort foods. Can I come in?”

Stunned into silence, Alec stepped aside let him through and headed towards the kitchen for his abandoned cup of coffee. He could feel Simon close behind him, and oddly enough, his presence sparked a smile that was artfully hidden. “What’s _knish_?”

Simon set the plate on the counter and checked the foil covering. “It’s the best. It’s dough that’s either baked or deep fried filled with potatoes and caramelized onions. I could eat a whole dish of them in two minutes flat when I was a kid. Here in New York, it’s a Jewish staple of comfort food. I thought you could use some.” He straightened up and looked at Alec with that _look_ that Alec had never been able to understand—it was disarmingly kind and thoughtful.

“Why would you do that for me?” Alec asked bluntly, pressing his fingers into the hot ceramic of his coffee mug until they were tingling and numb.

Simon seemed genuinely baffled by the question, his hands faltering as he put a few deep-fried pastry parcels on a plate. “I wanted to help. We’re kind of friends, you know? It seemed like the right thing to do.”

When they had first met, the gentleness Alec could see in Simon read like naivety. He was practically a child, and mundane to boot. He was worried about the attention Isabelle paid him because he was afraid that the boy wouldn’t last more than a few days in their world, and feared for her pain. He couldn’t really say he was surprised when Raphael brought Simon’s body to them and explained the situation, though a part of him felt the old familiar guilt of losing someone else. What he hadn’t been prepared for was the fact that the fledgling vampire remained one of the kindest people he had ever been around, and never once wavered in his loyalty to them all. Begrudgingly at first, Alec found himself endeared to Simon, and the beginnings of what probably could be considered friendship had started growing.

“This is about yesterday, isn’t it?”

“I could tell you were serious,” Simon started carefully, “and that made me kind of worried? I know that there’s nothing you wouldn’t do for Magnus, and I understand that, but becoming a vampire doesn’t seem like the smart plan.”

The smell of the _knish_ Alec had pulled in half made his mouth water, and he realized just how empty his stomach was. “You did okay,” he pointed out before popping a piece in his mouth. It was warm and soft and delicious, and his heart twisted in his chest at the surge of affection he felt for Simon and his golden heart.

“I had a lot of help,” Simon argued, “and time. And things still went to hell pretty fast if you remember. I just went from being mundane to being a vampire; you would be giving up something entirely different. And I know what it’s like to spend your whole life as one thing and then one twist of fate later you realize you don’t recognize that person anymore. Magnus would be crushed if he felt responsible for that.”

Alec shook his head, lips pursed. “I’m not giving up on him, Simon. This is the only viable option we have right now to get me to Edom.”

“You don’t know that though,” Simon said gently, putting another few parcels on Alec’s plate. “This is something no one has ever really attempted as far as we know, right?”

Alec felt his hackles rise reflexively and he gave a stern retort: “I’m not just going to leave him in Edom. I’m not just giving up because it would be easier that way.” He felt guilty as soon as he said it, the venom of his words burning his tongue. A resigned sigh was the soothing chaser. “I’m sorry, Simon.”

It would have been infuriating how Simon’s expression had somehow grown even softer and more empathetic if it weren’t for the fact that it felt like some of the weight on Alec’s shoulders had been alleviated. “Magnus is going to come home one way or another. If anyone could find a way to move heaven, earth, and hell for the one they loved, there’s no doubt in my mind that it would be you two,” Simon smiled shyly. “I just… I don’t want you to do something out of desperation that could have a lot more consequences than you bargained for.”

Alec took advantage of the pause in conversation to go to the refrigerator and take out a pitcher of specially made Bloody Mary mix. The smell turned his stomach, metallic and sharp, but he figured it was the least he could do for his guest, pouring it into a tall glass and pushing it across the counter to Simon. “Extra bloody.”

A startled laugh preceded Simon taking the glass and tactfully turning away as he took a few sips. There was an oddly comfortable silence between them for a few moments, and Alec found himself thinking that maybe he had been missing out by keeping Simon at arm’s length for so long.

“I’m grateful for the life I have now,” Simon said suddenly. “I wouldn’t wish it away, but I’m not sure if I would have chosen this for myself even if I knew what could come from it. The choice was made for me and I resented Clary for that at first.” He paused for a moment, turning to look at Alec. “Sometimes doing nothing is the right move; for a little while at least, so you can think through things more clearly and make a better choice.”

Alec hadn’t noticed he had been worrying the skin between his thumb and forefinger roughly with his blunt nails until one of them broke skin with a sharp stab of pain. “Maybe,” he allowed, albeit kindly.

Having sensed the impasse they had reached for the time being, Simon set down his nearly empty glass. “I should probably get going, I just wanted to stop by.” He straightened his jacket but lingered for a moment, tapping his fingers on the countertop. “You know, there’s this Jewish prayer that we say for those in mourning; Beck said it for me when I lost my mom after everything that happened and it was comforting for me. It’s typically for dealing with death but it's about loss too.”

Alec nodded in reply to the unspoken question.

The smooth recitation of Hebrew was calming, even if Alec didn’t know the meaning of the words themselves. Simon kept his gaze down, hands out with palms facing down. “ _Yehe shelama rabba min shemayya hayyim vesava vishuʻa veneḥama veshezava urfuʼa ugʼulla usliha v'khappara verevaḥ vehatzala lanu ulkhol ʻammo yisrael v'ʼimru amen. ʻoseh shalom bimromav hu berakhamav yaʻase shalom ʻalenu v'ʻal kol yisra'el, v'ʼimru amen._ ”

His fingers twitched in an aborted motion, but then he reached over and touched Alec’s arm carefully. “Everything is going to be okay, man. We’ll figure something out.”


End file.
